Be a Single and Happy

Being single is not anything to be ashamed about in our age! We live in a time when most relationships break up and there is no guarantee that even the best ones will last. In the meantime, there is much to enjoy in life, and singleness has a great many benefits that those couples you envy would give an arm or a leg for!

Steps

1. Take charge of your reality and give up all that envy! Stop worrying about everyone else around you getting into relationships, and thinking that you need to as well. All those happy couples in movies and TV shows are the fabrications of Hollywood writers - fairytale imaginings designed to sell tickets and get high TV ratings. Real couples have messy lives - they fight, leave the bathroom dirty and steal the remote from each other. Give up those unrealistic fantasies of your 'soulmate', and notice how most people around you are just regular folk - good people, but not magical heroes who fix each others' lives.

2. Focus on becoming the best person you can be. Take classes, work out, grow a garden, do volunteer work, go to therapy, do whatever your heart desires - for you! Once you feel better about yourself, you will attract more friends and maybe a little romance! But once you become the person you like, you may be less willing to compromise what's important for romance.

3. This is the time for you to concentrate on yourself and figure out what you like and don't like. Make plans with friends that you haven't seen in a while. Take a nice, hot bath. Read a book, or walk the dog. Take time for yourself, and don't sweat finding someone. You can't go on looking for love, love has to find you.

4. Indulge yourself. Go out and get your nails done, have a spa day and get a massage. Just because you no longer have someone to impress or please doesn't mean you should stop pleasing yourself. You are now a strong, independent person who deserves the best. So give it to yourself!

5. Now that you're single this is a great time to go out and have fun. Flirt if you like, go out to clubs with your friends. Play the field. You are no longer committed to anyone but yourself, and you have every right to do as you wish.

6. Granted don't take the above advice as going for every piece of ass out there. You have a reputation to uphold, and a promise to your body, mind and soul to take care of you. You don't need another person to make you feel special.

7. I know its hard not to get depressed or lonely when you see other couples around you wrapped up in their own bliss (remember, it's not always that way). Just remind yourself that you love yourself and that you are special and do not need another person to complete you. One day, who knows, you may come across that special someone as well. But for now, be patient and take that time that you would spend caring for another person, to care for yourself.

8. Realize that you are still lucky and fortunate. Many people around the world are either: chronically ill, homeless, living in poverty, starving, fleeing from warfare, and have no personal freedoms due to dictatorships. If you are depressed and think you are not lucky because you are single, think again!. People in those aforementioned conditions have it harder than you!

9. Take up a new hobby! Learn guitar, join a tap class, grow a garden, write a novel, cook some gourmet meals! Whatever you've ever wanted to do, do it now. This is your time to shine and live your life. Do what makes you happy.

10. If you have low self-esteem or confidence or don't know how to love or care for yourself, then now's the time. Look in the mirror and tell yourself things you like about yourself. Repeat phrases to yourself such as "I am a strong, and beautiful individual" and tell your reflection that you love you. You need to know that you cannot expect others to make you happy. You are the only person who can make you happy in the end.

11.  In the end, once you stop focusing so much on what you don't have you'll start to realize how much you do have. Turn your negative thoughts into positive ones. Its a long, hard process, but just keep at it and soon you'll realize that the glass in not half-empty but half-full.

12. Become an optimist, a trait that helps you whether you are single, married, divorced or widowed! Keep a gratitude diary and every night think of 3 things you are grateful for. Find the silver lining in everything throughout your day, and savor little pleasures. You'll live longer, make it through tough times more smoothly, and even avoid the common cold more often!

Share |